Sweet Memories

Good old days of memories past,
Comes like butterflies in the wind,
Brushing your cheeks with their lips so kind,
With tender kisses ever so light.

It reminds you of the days past,
When the heart was so light,
The days when you had butterflies in your stomach,
Everytime the wind blew, gave a heart ache.

Gone are those good days in life ,
But when the wind of the old days blew again,
Did the heart skip a beat once  again?
Did the butterflies in stomach come alive?

Oh, you brought the feeling back,
Of long forgotten days, of past
Now, why do this happen ever so fast,
When the wind kisses my cheek.

Oh, Good days of memories past,
Slow down, take a breath which last,
For this moment might not last,
So, enjoy this few memoirs of the past.




Letting Go!

Letting go is never easy. Those who have tried it can vouch for that. But are we truly divine? We humans find it easier to hold on, than to let go, no matter how burdened it makes us feel. Ha! To feel lite again, just to run as swift as our light feathered legs could carry us. Just to sprint on that tender toes, like a deer. Just to, just to, i can go on. But am I yet ready for that flight? That’s something to ponder over. U know i love to collect all nicky nacky things in the world from young. A differently shaped pebble, forsaken stone of any thrown away ring, different colourful erasers, oh you know, i can just go on. But never realised i will do the same within me too. Not letting go of hurt, not letting go of tit tats, not letting go of petty things which ouched, oh no! I can still go on, this sudden realisation of the sensation that I need a tons of persuasion to let go! That made me stop on my track and made me to look behind the trail I left behind.

A lot of us like to hold on to feelings, emotional, hurtful or any thing that might be, its as if we need it, to thrive on, not realising even for a minute that it’s feeding on us, eating away our happiness, our inner peace, our capability to love, to feel compassionate, to feel empathy in fact, in a way it’s feeding on our very existence.
There are times, I felt very burdened about the way I feel, wished that I  could just keep down the heavy heart and it’s heaviness and for once take a deep breath filling my lungs and me with fresh oxygenated air.

The very aspiration that letting go is the first step to having a future which comes without any baggage is to be acknowleged. If dreams has to come true, we have to dream isn’t it? The same way if we need to articulate between letting go and holding on then we need to accept that we are hurt and we choose to let go instead of holding on to. It won’t change anything which happened, but it’s sure to change something in the future. And it’s this future we look forward to. We may not be divine, but we sure are human, who reflects the divine nature.

So just let go! And float, if not physically but mentally, and be carefree, for tomorrow can take care of it’s own problems.

Announcement of a Saviour’s Birth

Morn blissful and blessed morning,
The new dawn of a new born,
Brought the world a new Messiah,
To the earth came the Heavenly Kingdom.

Afar and faraway, came together cause of him,
Poor and rich was the same for him.
Name and fame he never seeked
Nevertheless he was the King of Kings

He hated sin, but never the sinners,
He was loved by all but forsaken by his own,
He came down to us to be one among us,
He is the I am and yet became a carpenter’s Son.

It’s the season of Joy and celebration,
It’s the season of glad tidings and hope,
It’s the season of Love and peace,
It’s the season which brings all close together.

This day brings with it all the goodness,
This day, over and over reminds us,
That a saviour, is born to deliver,
And redeem us, and to give us the hope of an eternal life.


Ups and Downs of A Bubble called Life

It was raining after such a long time. Pitter patter of the rain drops sounded like music to her ears. It felt like a consolation for her isolation. The earth drank up the water as if it was her first ever milk from the mother. Ha! The thirst of the earth was like nothing she had seen and felt for quite some time.
The whole scenario made her go back to the innocent days of her childhood. Ah! What fun it was to get wet in the rain and to splash around the raindrops. Remembering those days made her nostalgically emotional, the steam of the coffee mug she held in her hands brought her back to the present. She wondered, how many people today had the time or the patience to enjoy small joys of life like this. If she had the literary sense of a poet, she would have been already penning away the poetical beauty of the rain. The poet would have probably described the earth and the rain drops as long lost lovers. The earth hugging all the drops of rain as if there is no tomorrow. That’s what a poet does best, trying to find out the hidden love in everything.

Love, holds different meaning at different time in everyone’s life. It did, in her life too. But she now, prefers to say the definition of love differs in every stage of life. She had learned that love can be colder than the ice and can make rain drops seem like fire drops on self when in love. Love sometimes can be torturous, reminding every time It is like disasters in motion, days of devotion availing nothing but pain. But all in vain. It is many a times easier said than done. Being in love is like, being lost in an ocean, getting swept away by the tide, with no option but drowning. All these rules of this universe just pulled her down. Where in all what she wanted was to fly away to a place so high where she could kiss the sky.

She felt the choke in her windpipe when she remembered her past yesterdays. She loses herself in her thoughts. And she had learned over the years that we can be outstandingly defensive about our thoughts. She Floated away in her thoughts , as if in a mist. She was always that sort of person, always a day dreamer who have lived the life she wanted in her day dreams. But lately she feels twisted in her head. As if she can’t think straight, increasingly having difficulty concentrating on things. Unsteady of present and unsure of the future. Not Good, she mutters to herself, No! She doesn’t like her current situation at all. She was better of daydreaming, at least there, everything was always picture perfect.

Happy moments in her life were like the dew drops which magically disappears with the rising sunshine. How much ever beautiful they were, she felt its lifespan in her life was short. Life had ridiculed her, tested her patience, punished her for no fault of hers & tormented her until she wished she was dead.

Are we all victims of our fate, or do we define our own destiny? Pondering over this made her mind more sluggish.
Life can be unpredictable, that’s the truth we fail to realise. How can life possibly go on after certain incidents which turns out to be tragedies at least for the person who goes through it. Some personal scars do remain, there is only 2 ways of handling it. Either u can brood over it or learn to accept it and co live with it. Time heals everything and every wound, when there is a zest for living life simply moves on.

If life was a book her life would have made an interesting story to read. A typical Kamala Das story. There is no perfect story like Life. Action, Drama, Romance, Sentiments etc… etc… Life seems like a burden when we live it but how interesting it is when we read it as a story as a third person. The rain had dulled over, the sun took up it’s duty, never leaving a clue that it had rained some time back. All the clouds gave way for the sun. Many a times, our life depicts the same picture, the clouds of gloom days just wrapped up by the sun of better days all bright and shining, but the only difference is that our mind never let goes of anything, anything for that matter. And that is where the painful memories succeeds in leaving a stain in the sunny days of our life. If only our mind had learned to let go of things which hurt us. Wishful thinking, that’s all it is. Oh, Lets just face it, our mind is not the calmest of the rivers to sit by. Always bubbling up with something or the other, never still for a moment. She was mesmerised at its capacity to keep up with all things in time…Time!! it’s all about time

While her mind and her thoughts wandered away, she realised all her past felt like another life she lead from what she was living now. Did she really live a life like that before or was it all just a fragmentation of her imagination. She longed for a fresh start. Ha! If only life had an escape route and a fresh new identity. If she had a chance, a place where no body knows or recognizes her, a completely different place would be her choice for that fresh start. Who knows may be life would give her a second chance to erase away the messed up situations in her life.
Things are not as simple in life as we try to make it. Life is most of the time, Complex! And if it is not, then we make it complex. Life is as complicated or simple as we want to make it. You cannot blame others for the happiness and sadness in your life. Sometimes it so happens in our life, that we easily see and feel others problems but somehow can never understand our own sorrows. We live in our own bubble, we don’t even realise what is happening in the outside world. And even if we know we forget it conveniently or rather we don’t won’t to remember it.

Her mornings waited for the nights to come and her nights waited for the mornings to come. So it went on, both coming and going but her mornings and nights couldn’t bring anything along with it that could satisfy her. She still waits! And her memories gives her company. Good and Bad both. Those memories had become her shadows and how much can one run, from their own shadow.

Our life has lots of passing clouds in it. It comes with all its puffiness and stays on for some time in which we too floats but it goes quietly as it came. But some clouds leaves with thunder and lightening and it leaves a dark sky behind, but that soon clears up to reveal a clear blue sky, and we wait for another puffed up cloud to come along. But one thing she always told herself, and others, was never ever mistake silences for weakness, Some times the air is still, before the onset of a hurricane.

Her legs could never keep up with the speed of her mind. It just wandered, over all the terrains and she could never stop it. Sometimes that made her feel that she was encapsulated and entrapped in a fragile body. “Fragile! Handle with care!” She wanted to command to her body to keep up with her mind. But No! Her body acted like an adamant child who insisted about its capacity. If she could dump her body and soar away with her spirit, she would have done so many things she only dreamt of. Again! Wishful thinking. That’s all. Like every other wishes of hers.






Precious Moments

Life never seems the way we want it. But we live it, the best way we can. There is no perfect life, but we can fill it with perfect moments.

Have you ever wondered, how we tend to get adapted to the situation we are in after the initial hesitance. When we turn back to look at our past, there are lot of things we regret, but we can’t or don’t want to change those as those moments made us what we are today. Ya! May be it could have turned into something else if in those instances we reacted differently. But we didn’t, that’s what made us what we are today. Are we proud of what we are today? May be not! But we are too proud to accept that. We all live in a fictional bubble, comfy in the fact that the world inside that bubble is ours. We hate to come out of it or to break it in fear of facing the reality. But for those perfect moments our life seems such a drag.
What if the life treated us differently? Do you really think we would be satisfied then, no way, then too we would want what is not ours then. That is human nature. I have never met a complete satisfied man, who seemed cent percent satisfied about his life in my lifetime, have you? That’s exactly why we say Life is not fair. But we do can make some perfect moments in our life: which lasts a life time memories. And I here by wish you from the bottom of my heart to have those precious little moments constantly in your life.
And ha! There will always be people in your life who treat you wrong. Be sure to thank them for making you strong. See didn’t I start of you with a little precious moment in your life. Now scoot off and start making yours. Have a wonderful day ahead.

Melody of a vanishing Dew drop

Bloomed like a new blossomed flower,
Like a fresh dew drop on a green grassmeadow,
Like a rising of the early spring,
On the bark of a fig newly sprung,
And that’s how she was, fresh like nature in full glory.

A new song of the early morning cuckoo,
A new raga of the morning Mynah,
A song of the nature welcoming the golden rays of sun,
A fresh melody of the morning choir of birds,
Which wakes us in the early morning.

That was what she was in life,
Till the drastic event turned her life like a fly caught in a cunning spiders web,
Like a broken petal of a drooping flower,
Like the vanishing act of a magician,
The person she used to be just snapped away.

The dew drop which disappeared,
From the petal, At the first sight,
Of the harsh days sun light,
Life sucked out of the very bird,
Which sang the first sweet melody.

Which woke us from our sweet nights dreams,
But now, that very song is like a cry for help from the passing breeze,
Hard to differentiate now whether
It’s the dew drop or the tear drop anymore,
Dreading to come out to peep.

When will she shine back like the morning star,
When will she bloom again like the wild flower she once was,
When will she sing again, the sweey melody of life,
She too awaits that day’s come back through her writings.
She awaits the light to penetrate the dark tunnel in her life.

Realisation of a snapped Serendipity

Something snapped today. And it made me think! Think about many things in life. Am I even sane to the fact that my life is treating me unfair? Do I realise that I have a task of swimming against the tide through out my entire life. Considered, a rebel in the early stages of growing up, I am still rebelling against all the odds life is throwing at me. But this rebellion is for survival. And the expectation to have an understanding relationship rowing with you against the tide during this cruciating times is asking for stars in the sky. I wonder many a times, whether I am unable to maintain any kind of relationship for that matter. It was as if a bubble burst, a fictional bubble I had created in my mind. How could I think everything is gonna workout fine for me. Struggle is written in every step of my way. Every damn (excuse the language) step I take. It seems unfair sometimes, that some have it easy, whereas others has to struggle for every thing. Every damn (excuse the language) thing in life. Every step we take is being watched, every word spoken has to be with caution, God knows what can bring harm and when. Life is short, why doesn’t people understand it and act accordingly. No!!!! They have to bring complications in everything. The way things are done, in the way words are spoken, in every action we do. God!!! How can life be lived so measured? A lifetime goes away, living life measured! Why doesn’t people realise it? Why do I have to bear the brunt of the spineless character of somebody? Why??? Why life is so unfair? Why???



Have you ever felt trapped? I feel trapped! Trapped in a space where I am stuck. Immobilized is exactly how I feel right now. Feels like my souring soul is trapped in a body which is too weak to keep up to my need of my carefree soul. Have you ever felt this way, where you want so many things done, and you are stuck trapped, unable to do anything about it. If you have, then you will understand exactly what I am trying to say here. I am so desperate to get out. To just escape.
It’s hard to learn how to exist again. It takes time to compile things back. It really takes time. But by that time people around you looses patience. And that makes you to go one step back which slows down your progression and eats up your self confidence, which again makes your feeling of trapped stronger.
Its much easier for others to give advice, as to how things should be done.
But they just cannot picturise what goes on in your head. There are times when I go blank, not able to keep in track of things going on with me or around me. Some times I loose my cool, finding it difficult to know that they don’t understand me or my trapped situation. Can’t they see I am suffering? After all, I am trying, isn’t that a big deal? It’s not that i have given upon on myself.
Its a better tomorrow’s hope, which is keeping me to go on….. today, far from a bleak yesterday. Even in this trapped situation. Really Wish that was appreciated!

New to blogging

This is the first ever blog I am about to post online. Completely new to it, but not new to the act of scribbling each and every feelings down on and off. I hope that sounds familiar. Trying my hand at publishing my thoughts too. Like me if u please. But I plan to go on irrespective of the fact my blogs catch the attention or not. For starters I would like to submit a small work of mine. Hoping this will start as a good kick start to a new chapter in my blogging life.

Where Do I go from Here

Where do I go from here
When I thought I was home
Now where do I go from here
Now that this is not the home

Tired and weary, how long
Can i go on, without any idea
Nothing to go on and nobody along
How long to go on without any aim

Nowhere in sight i find light
Not able to carry the aimless weight
Of the broken heart and the memories
Dragging my feet along full of bruises .

Somewhere i have to stop and rest
Tired of this life and its test
I still go on, in search of a sight
Which will give me and my mind some rest